aefenglom | 001. [ text ]

You're dealing with "going crazy" bullshit only once a month. That counts as an upside right?

you know who else has to deal with going crazy once a month? women

so yeah basically no, that doesn’t actually make me feel any better

Edited 2019-08-16 09:53 (UTC)

Could be going crazy progressively more and more with each day, you know? Or exploding.

[ but witches have it haaaaaard too! ]

But yeah, I can see how it doesn't sound like an upside... so how about this: getting some new nifty senses to explore the world with>?

yeah but i already had those before i showed up here so it's nothing new

have you ever actually seen a witch explode?

Seen? No. But I got way too close for comfort to have that happening to me.

Give it a month or two more though and you might witness some fireworks.

I HAVE IT ON GOOD AUTHORITY THAT BEING A MONSTER HELPS WITCHES TO NOT EXPLODE.
SO WHEN I WAKE UP IN THE DIRT WITHOUT MEMORIES, I JUST TRY TO REMIND MYSELF...
SOMEHOW, THIS IS HELPFUL.
BUT WAKING UP IN THE DIRT SEEMS TO HAPPEN A LOT MORE OFTEN THAN PEOPLE ALMOST EXPLODING.

[His favorite part of the full moon is the part where the day before and after tend to have nearly full moon energy, because one day of it isn't enough.]

see, that’s what i’m talking about

i haven’t seen a single witch talking about that funny time they almost exploded on these things

seems a little one sided is all

THE DANGERS OF EXPLODING MIGHT HAVE BEEN EXAGGERATED...
BUT I'M SURE THEY'RE REAL.

LOTS OF WITCHES DO LOTS OF MAGIC TO BURN OFF THE EXCESS ENERGY.
(I THINK THAT'S WHY THERE'S SO MANY PRANKSTERS.)

BUT... I DON'T DISAGREE. IT SEEMS PRETTY ONE-SIDED.
MAYBE YOU SHOULD ASK SOME PEOPLE WHO GREW UP HERE!
THE LIFELONG MOON MONSTERS ARE USED TO IT.
US MIRRORBOUND ARE STILL STUMBLING AROUND, FIGURING IT OUT.

so witches get to burn off their magic by fucking with people and the rest of us just have to deal with it? boo fucking hoo

maybe if they have that much energy they should find something useful to do

i'll try asking around

SOME WITCHES GO OUTSIDE THE CITY, FIGHTING THE CWYLD, OR GOING EXPLORING...
THEY'RE CLEARING OUT A REALLY TERRIBLE CAVE.
SOON WE'LL HAVE A NEW PLACE TO GO VISIT.

AND SOME MAKE CALMING POTIONS TO HELP WITH BONDS OR BAD FULL MOONS.

[Others, no comment.]

hold on, a terrible cave? now that sounds like my kind of place

is that the one they were looking for people who could see in the dark? sounded like a pretty boring job to me

what makes it so bad?

THAT'S THE ONE!

IT WAS FULL OF HUNGRY DOG-SIZED SPIDERS.
NOT JUST TEA PARTY HUNGRY, EITHER...
HUNGRY ENOUGH TO BITE A SKELETON AND GO FOR MARROW.
AND IF THAT WASN'T BAD ENOUGH, THEY WERE POISONOUS ENOUGH TO MAKE ME SEE THINGS AND FORGET WHERE I WAS.
OR IS IT VENOMOUS?

ANYWAY, THEY'VE BEEN CLEARING IT OUT SINCE THEN.
THERE'S PROBABLY FEWER SPIDERS NOW.

i mean, i haven't done that even once

the claws are nice

lucky you

must be a scale of monster shittiness, then

actually that’s a good question what’s the shittiest monster to be

skills.

worst? depends on your definition. but i think the vampires have to literally die when they change so.

yeah, but it's a temporary condition after that, isn't it?

i'd be more annoyed about not being able to eat anything but blood, myself.

well then you can't go out in the sun or anything.

i knew a few people who would sustain themselves on blood, back home. weird, but they didn't seem to want anything else. but if you wanted real food... yeah, that would suck.

being a merrow maybe, too. getting a tail instead of legs when you get wet? hell no.

that sounds pretty vampirelike, you sure they weren't vampires?

sounds inconvenient as hell. get splashed with water and suddenly you're a fish? maybe i'm one of the lucky ones after all

they had to breathe and weren't dead, so yeah. they called themselves vampires? but they weren't vampire-vampires.

what's happening to you, that makes you so lucky?

i did turn into a cloud yesterday. does that count?

[It doesn't make up for some other things, but this guy is asking for upsides. Mary is at least attempting to comply.]

[ He's really only looking for potential things to mock Geralt for later, when he comes into his full witchiness or whatever you want to call it. In any case... ]

a cloud? how'd you pull that one off?

by thinking reallly hard about how i didn't want to turn into something hungry!

[Is that actually what triggered the transformation, or was it a happy accident? The world may never know.]

i guess a cloud doesn't have a stomach

so on the one hand you succeeded

but on the other hand what the fuck?

Edited 2019-08-21 14:51 (UTC)

i don't get it either! but i was able to sneak out the crack under a locked door and that was kind of cool. like one of those phantom thieves.

Pretty sure it's the latter. Drinking the koolaid and bonding someone helped somewhat but I'm still waiting for side effects from *that* to remind me why I didn't want to.

yeah, it sounds a little too good to be true

'hook up your feelings with someone else and you'll never have to worry about losing your shit on a full moon again'? nothing's that easy

Well, I can happily report that I haven't lost my shit so far, but we'll see when the next full moon comes around.

I can only imagine how awkward the feelings thing would be. Luckily I showed up with a good friend. It could be worse.

[ Yeah, Lambert showed up with a 'good friend' too. Difference being, thinking about being Bonded to him is kind of more repelling than something he'd want to do. He trusts Geralt, but trust has nothing to do with wanting to have what essentially amounts to your big brother hitching a ride in your head. ]

let me know how that works out for you

didn't really care for it when i dreamed about it so i don't think i'll be trying it anytime soon

[Luckily Bucky and Tony don't have that kind of history. They just have the kind of history where Bucky tried to murder him once and then they became friends.]

Sure. Hasn't been a disaster so far but that's all I can tell.

You dreamed about it?

I CAN APPARENTLY SPIT ACID NOW???????????

I AM STILL TRYING TO DETERMINE IF THIS ACTUALLY COUNTS AS AN "UPSIDE", OR IF IT IS SIMPLY JUST DISGUSTING.

ALSO, NOT EVERY MONSTER IS ABLE TO DO THIS THING.

SO YES IT MOSTLY JUST SUCKS.

i'd say half and half

being able to melt people's faces is an upside

but does that mean everything you eat tastes like acid?

I WOULD NOT MELT ANYONE'S FACE UNLESS I WAS EXTRAORDINARILY PROVOKED.

I ALSO DO NOT UNDERSTAND THE QUESTION. MY MOUTH IS NOT CONSTANTLY FULL OF ACID, THAT WOULD BE UNTENABLE.

Edited (WROOONNNG FORMATTING) 2019-08-20 01:04 (UTC)

being able to threaten people with melting their faces off is pretty good too

but yeah wouldn’t there be backwash or something? do you taste the acid after you spit it out? or is your whole mouth kind of numb now or something?

Edited 2019-08-20 12:29 (UTC)

i think the upsides depend on the type of monster. do you know which kind you are?

yeah, puca

[ He only uses the proper name because calling himself a rabbit is sort of demeaning. ]

Edited 2019-08-21 22:13 (UTC)

i've heard that they have minor luck magics? and also they're very capable of sensing danger...

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