substances: (resolute)
klaus hargreeves ([personal profile] substances) wrote in [community profile] aefenglom2021-01-04 10:42 am
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@GOSUCKADUCK; text

Name: Klaus Hargreeves
Date: Ieneuer 4
Format: text
NOTE: Blanket content warning for mild discussion of drug use in the comments.

single 30ish male witch seeking strapping monster to bond with
fur feathers fins etc are all fine
but bonus points if youre horny
my hobbies include long hot baths listening to music released before 1980 and whatever thing im trying right now to see if it sticks
call me!


what do you guys think? too forward? not forward enough?
i feel like the word strapping is a little outdated but like
what other word can you use for that?

anyway tips on ad writing are very appreciated
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hearthebell: (I've got thick skin and an elastic heart)

[personal profile] hearthebell 2021-01-05 04:17 am (UTC)(link)
It would be a strange thing to joke about.

I have a card entitling its bearer to a free lap dance at Frisky's Feline Fantasies in the Entertainment District. It's signed by a performer whose stage name is Zero. I won it in a poker game, and you're welcome to it, if you want it.

That's probably the easiest way to meet him, off the top of my head.
substances: (amazed)

[personal profile] substances 2021-01-05 05:06 am (UTC)(link)
in my humble experience you can joke about pretty much anything

zero huh
souns interesting thou are you sure you dont want the lapdance?
lapdances are good
hearthebell: will credit if found (And she feeds you tea and oranges)

[personal profile] hearthebell 2021-01-06 02:15 am (UTC)(link)
I'll lethargically parry with the observation that some people can be given a structurally sound and masterfully engineered joke on a silver platter, and still fail to make it land.

I've never received one, and frankly don't understand the appeal, but it you have, and you do, I have every reason to believe he's very good at his job.
substances: (ciggy)

[personal profile] substances 2021-01-06 07:40 am (UTC)(link)
tru
but i am not one of those people

huh well i guess each to his own
ill totally take it
but zero beter be hot
is he hot?
hearthebell: (I've got thick skin and an elastic heart)

[personal profile] hearthebell 2021-01-06 03:50 pm (UTC)(link)
[A somewhat significant pause as L considers that question and alllll of his potential answer's myriad implications.]

I suppose that by the standards of most, he would be considered attractive.
substances: (thinker)

[personal profile] substances 2021-01-08 07:51 am (UTC)(link)
well that was carefully wroded
suspicious
hearthebell: (I can do it with gourmet taste)

[personal profile] hearthebell 2021-01-08 08:44 pm (UTC)(link)
It was honestly worded. The nature of objectivity is that speculation is the only way for any biased individual to approach it.
substances: (sobriety)

[personal profile] substances 2021-01-11 08:57 pm (UTC)(link)
that sounds liek a lot of fancy talk to cover up that you think hes hot
Edited 2021-01-11 20:57 (UTC)
hearthebell: (I hope I become a ghost)

[personal profile] hearthebell 2021-01-12 04:44 am (UTC)(link)
Or maybe it's a lot of fancy talk to say that my standards are wildly off-kilter with what the rest of the world considers normal.
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